Monday, June 13, 2016

Don't let them take your heart

Don't let them take your heart

It happens quietly, and slowly 
the way the spirit fights for life
But the spirit is only so resilient

The heart must act.

Don't let them take your heart

The fear that fills us
The sadness that slows us
The anger that devours us
The dread that comes with the first glance at morning headlines
Don't learn to expect the worst
Don't become less surprised

Don't let them take your heart

Shore up your faith in the humanity which connects us
Keep the capacity to grieve, to cry for a stranger
Don't let your spirit lose its fight

Don't let them take your heart.

When it seems unsafe to be where you belong
When it seems everyone might be a killer in the making or a victim in waiting
Remember that fear only feels like information
And that far more evil has been stopped than perpetrated 

Don't let them take your heart.

Monday, June 6, 2016

Now to then and back again.

Grief is heavy
If it slows your steps at times
It is  to remember who you lost
Without getting lost yourself.

Three years ago today, my brother Bill died.   
In the still fog of the days that followed, I wrote this  about grief

June 14, 2013

"I made you laugh. I LOVE when that happened." --Bill Cook (1960-2013)

Grief is a boulder in the middle of the room.
It can't be budged.
If you push it away, it won't yield
When you aren't watching where you walk, you fall over it
And it hurts
You can't pretend it isn't there
You can move the furniture to walk around it
But it still blocks your view of something
You can try and live in another room altogether
But you have to pass by it eventually to go from now to then and back again
Grief is like a boulder in the middle of the room
It doesn't belong there
You don't want it there
You throw a blanket over it
It feels too big for the room
Too big for your life
You cry

And finally, grief speaks
It says: I might be in your way, but I used to live in your heart
I am your memories
I am your loss
But I am what you cherished for a long time
I am trying to find a way back in
But you won't open it
You walk around me
You avoid me
Open your heart
And I will live there again

You sit next to the grief boulder
Because you understand
You need to fill that space in your heart
To feel whole again.
So you make a deal
You will honor grief
And grief will help you heal.

You let it in.
It feels heavy, hard to carry
But your view is clear
Your travel is unobstructed
from now to then and back again

Without that boulder in the way.