Here's to more gentle living and a better view of everything in 2020

This looks like a nice place to practice
  some gentle living, doesn't it?

Wouldn't it be such a waste of all we learn, all the time, from each day, from each other, from our mistakes, from our brilliant ideas if all we did was lament not knowing it sooner?

Yes, is the answer to that. It would be. 

"Forgive yourself for not having the foresight to know what now seems so obvious in  hindsight," is what a recent meme said about that.

With that, I've put together some favorite takeaways from the past year that I will refer to often while I travel as gently as possible through the next. I hope you like and can use them as well.

My favorite rules for a gentler life, brought to you by experience. 

Share things about other people that you hope will get back to them.

When something is beautiful and unexpected enough to make you choke up, that is your soul saying,  Hi, I thought you'd like this.

You were not ready to use that thing you know now, but wish you knew a decade ago. Back then, you knew other things you could have used when you were ten. Respect, don't regret this gift of age.  It doesn’t work any other way.

Don’t assume that caring about you is motive enough for a person to change their behavior. It may be a behavior they’ve been trying to get rid of for a long time for their own sake and can’t. Have your line in the sand, but if you must ask, make it “will you?” and not, “why can’t you?”

Where there have been issues in the past, there will be triggers in the future. Fix that shit before it jumps out of the alley and steals your hard-earned, well-deserved peace of mind.

Most of the time, there’s nothing wrong. You’re just tired. Go to bed.

It’s sometimes those people who are least likely to be one of your people, who teach you very important things about yourself.

You can get through anything as long as there is one person with whom you can fall apart and feel better for it, not worse.

Your most important job is to know who you are and what you want. Your heart is where those answers are. Even if you decide to defy it and do something else, your heart is not wrong.

It is perfectly okay to be with someone who is in distress and not have a single thing to say as long as you are holding their hand.

Use and love your skill set. But now and then, also say hello to your flaw set and give it some attention. It’s there to make sure you always have something to work on, and improve your opinion of imperfection.

And finally:

Compliment a stranger every now and then – their clothes, their dog, their baby. You will turn whole days around for some people doing that and probably like yourself a little more, too. 

That's it, that's the stuff that made me love my life and days more than I did the year before. It is the stuff that makes me look forward to all of the days, of every year. 

With love, and best wishes for more gentle living and a better view of everything in 2020,

Susan